Editor’s note: A Jacksonville resident has been reviewing movies for friends for several years and has offered to share his thoughts with Daily Progress readers. His reviews come in personal letters to his nicknamed friend, Spud Nut. Our reviewer is Tater Tot, so consequently, the movies get ratings based on potatoes.

Spud Nut,

Two box office smash hits have opened this weekend that have attracted the largest matinee and evening audiences I have ever seen in our little town. The Blind Side (PG-13, 126 minutes) is a true sports story that may win Sandra Bullock an academy award for her portrayal of Leigh Anne Tuohy of Memphis who adopted Michael Oher and helped him become an Ole Miss all American and eventual pro-football player. Quinton Aaron is big enough in person to be a left tackle, and truly fills the screen as the homeless Afro-American teenager whose best quality is his devoted protectiveness of those he loves. Oher is a gentle giant who must be motivated like Ferdinand the Bull to use his talents. Tim McGraw and Kathy Bates round out the cast in a feel good movie worth three-plus BIG potatoes.

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The Twilight Saga: New Moon (PG-13, 130 minutes) is the second in the teenage soap opera series about a normal girl (Kristen Stewart) in a forbidden romance with a vampire (Robert Pattinson). When he (Edward) separates from her (Bella) in order to protect her, Bella’s broken heart is consoled by her dear friend Jake. He turns out to be a werewolf and is opposed to all vampires. This girl really knows how to pick bad boys doesn’t she. Edward, must appear before the high court of the Volturi (sort of like the Vatican for vampires) to resolve his fate, and Bella’s too. This script caters to young girls’ fantasies, providing them with beefcake scenes galore. The film is like catnip for adolescent feminine felines. The rest of us will rate the movie about two potatoes probably.

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Old Dogs (rated PG, 88 minutes) is a buddy movie about two middle aged men providing inept childcare for seven-year old twins. John Travolta and Robin Williams try to reprise their success in Wild Hogs with this tame family comedy released by the Disney studios for the Thanksgiving holidays. Many of the funny scenes that had been shown in the previews lost their punch in the movie, except for the Robin Williams sequence on the golf course when he miss hits errant balls into painful places. Bernie Mac made one of his last appearances in a cameo role, meaning this film has been on the shelf and in the can since before August 2008. The cast has a lot of other appearances by actors whose careers have long since peaked and qualify them as being “old dogs” (Kelly Preston, Matt Dillon, Ann Margret, and Seth Green). If you don’t have high expectations for this film, then you might give it almost a two potato rating, but barely. Go see The Blind Side again and you’ll be happier about how you spend your time in the theater.

Tater Tot