By John McCloskey
My relationship with my little pal, Inky, has its ups and downs and talking to him can be a real experience, because he also talks to the other dogs who don’t talk to me — well, they don’t talk to me like Inky does, anyway, and that’s all right because they still let me know how they feel about things around the house. Inky seems to be evolving into sort of a spokesman for the group, and their collective thinking has it’s interesting side.
Take yesterday, for instance. Inky and his Chihuahua pal, Pancho came trotting into the living room. They sat down in front of me and proceeded to stare me down.
“What?” I said, “Can’t you see that I’m working?” They continued to stare. I turned back to my computer and ignored them. Pancho grabbed the leg of my jeans and began to pull. “You better quit that or you’ll end up being a hood ornament!” He kept on pulling. Finally, I gave up and turned around to face them. “All right, Inky, I’m listening, but this better be important.”
From the floor, “We want to go live in the woods.”
Oh, boy, where is this coming from? “Have you guys got any idea what lives in the woods?”
Blank stare.
“There are all sorts of dangers out there. And besides, look at you two! You guys are the smallest in the house. Pancho doesn’t weigh more than three pounds, and Inky, you’re not much bigger. Think about it!”
At that, Inky arches his back and fixes a cold, one-eyed stare on me. “I’ll have you know the Chinese once considered my ancestors ferocious dogs and we were held in high esteem by Chinese royalty!”
Now I’m in trouble. “Yes, I know that’s true, but there are all sorts of animals in the woods. Bobcats, copperhead snakes, and some other things I’ve only heard about - - and none of them are Chinese! It’s really not safe out there.”
“Don’t worry, we’re going to ask Rags to go with us.”
Rags is our ancient Lhasa Apso. “Rags? Rags is older than the hills. She has so much hair you would need an Indian guide to find her eyes! She would be no help to you. Did you stop to think about how hot it is out there? Well, it’s equally cold in the winter and I know for a fact Pancho does not like cold weather. What would you eat? Did you think of that?”
There was a silence while Inky and Pancho conferred, then Inky spoke. “We hadn’t discussed food. Perhaps we need to re-think our plans. Speaking of food, isn’t it time for dinner?”
I told him ‘re-thinking’ sounded like a good idea to me.
He turned to Pancho for another consultation, then said, “We’re going to see if there is any food left from this morning.” With that they trotted off in the direction of the kitchen. I returned to work, having averted another crisis.
John McCloskey, a long-time animal lover, and his Pekinese, Inky, are Maydelle residents. John’s latest novel, “Warrior Ching,” is available from www.publishamerica.com. John McCloskey can be contacted at john@inkyandjohn.com. A collection of the columns from the “Inky & John” series will be available in October 2006.